Is This Really It??

On: Ingrid Michaelson - Starting Now.

If you were falling, then I would catch you.You need a light, I'd find a match.
Cuz I love the way you say good morning.And you take me the way I am.
If you are chilly, here take my sweater.Your head is aching, I'll make it better.
Cuz I love the way you call me baby.And you take me the way I am.
I'd buy you Rogaine if you start losing all your hair.Sew on patches to all you tear.
Cuz I love you more than I could ever promise.

And you take me the way I am.

You take me the way I am.

You take me the way I am.

I was listening to that song... Thinking about relationship and this came to mind:

A couple years ago I had this friend who decided to do a research on famous men who had mistresses. She wanted to find out why would they keep and extra romance if they were already commited. Her reason to do so was she had been the mistress for over three years and she just couldnt get why.

So every week she'd post on her blog a short bio about the famous guy followed by a brief bio of the mistress as well. She didn't get to post most of the things she put together but one day, we were talking about it and she pointed out some interesting stuff... Basically most mistresses used to be more intelligent, goal driven, fun, smart, corageous. They were much less submissive and more independent and they usually were ahead of their time. And not just mistresses, most "weird couples" like Sartre and Simone de Beauvoir or Frida Kahlo and Diego Rivera, where the women had those qualities ended up suffering a lot, even though they were legally married or not their relationships were distant and more like friendships than anything else.

My friend then decided to just jump to the inevitable conclusion: men probably look for all those qualities when looking for the right girl however once they have all that, they can't take it. They go back to the opposite, they prefer to stay with the easy thing with the mild, less fun, less talkative, average smart... It's not risky and not challenging and not threatening. At first it sounds like the right choice, the reliable choice. In the long run he eventually realizes it's just frustrating to go back home and have the same old"what was your day like" talk over dinner. Not that I wouldnt enjoy that, I would.. but depending on the person it can just get ordinary.

So, with time I started to agree with her. First, men started to seem average, I can't not even begin to count how many guys I met who, in a sad attempt of being funny, made all this not so clever jokes and comments on my job or the same old "Oh i shoud be careful you might be analizing me" jokes after I said I went to psych school. And would think all my comments on life and all my advices were super amazing and intelligent... I need someone who challenges me, someone who is amazed by my skills but doesnt look at me as if I'm some sort of rare exotic almost unreachable person who you just have to find a way to win over for a night or something just so you have something to brag about the next day.

I wonder If there's any hope for me.