The Disposable.

On: Brett Dennen - There Is So Much More.


I'm pissed. And probably I shouldn't be. The thing with disposable things and people and situations and relationships is that you have to keep in mind, all the time, that they are in fact, disposable.

Disposable, in that context, can mean a bunch of things.. people you make friends with during a four day trip and then never hear from them again; a two day intense relationship, one night stands you'll definitely never see or hear from again; a trip you're only able to take once and so on.. But, another thing that makes all these things disposable is that they do have expiration dates and you should automatically assume that.

However, I don't think people in general are psychologically prepared for the disposable.There are those who take the disposable for non-perishable and think anything that happens could turn into solid reality and last forever.

I thought I'd be fine with the disposable thing, that I wouldn't care. Then I realized I'm just as selfish as probably most people are and also as reluctant as most people, tricking myself into believing I'd be just fine afterwards. As it turns out I do care, and it did hurt to see I became a turned page. I guess what got me is that I became disposable first for lack of a better plan and not the other way around.

It's not that I care.. I really think I don't, I think I'm just unleashing this selfish childish petty side of me, that can't stand losing or finishing last.
I wonder if all that made any sense. Ah I'm just temporarilly frustrated.